As for my earlier criticism of his writing – particularly with the Sex in the City generation in mind – is it Japanese schoolgirls he’s hanging around? (Actually he does mention something similar, come to think of it.) Most women these days are only too happy to publicly swoon over the right male physique and that is amply reflected in media, just not any that he’s watching (he should drink more Diet Coke and watch less Princess Bride).

And why shouldn’t they, they always have. You see there’s a whole big slice of Mother Nature in this, it’s all very 1.618 whether we like it or not. A lot of the excesses result from our species being a confused one, blending tournament and pair bonding characteristics like milk in wine and then adding the insult of an un-tempered super ego.

So very painfully much? Feel they must try and be beautiful/sexy? 20% of income? External validation is a bitch and an ironic one at that given our audience. The seeking of ‘self’-worth from that outside of the ‘self’ is a trap that a lot of people fall prey to. It’s even more pernicious given that recent generations have been raised by enlarge immature (un-tempered), due to skewed attachments that are predominantly influenced by peers and less so by the adults that once were. The formula that is employed in this seeking of external validation is a grim reflection of this; fancy cars, looking good, having the biggest stick, these were at one point in our culture characteristics of the adolescent – still are in some cultures – yet today they’re passed off as attributes for the adult individual in their society. These are meaningless things and offer nothing for the healthy development of a mature mind and a balanced soul from which meaningful expression may arise.

Anyhoo. I digress. I’ll call it a day there.

I don’t think the women crushing the men’s self-esteem in your office is really an ‘empowered female gaze’ thing as much as just more of the “got to prove my status as beautiful/successful OMIGOD it’s so important!!” same old nonsense.

Basically, he never says looks and success don’t matter. He just says that we probably all need to be careful about going along with an idea that ends up in often damaging places (such as men committing suicide when they lose their jobs, or women dying during plastic surgery operations – just to use some extreme examples! Less extreme examples like low self-esteem and a reduced sense of self-worth are just so commonplace nowadays as to not have much impact).

And I agree. The old stereotypes are so boring now. It’s time to just move on!

Thank you for your comment! I think that her saying “all jobs are degrading under capitalism” was possibly supposed to be preceded (mentally!) by, “If you say that it’s degrading to do *my* job for money, then mustn’t you say that…?” – or at least, those two points are connected in some way. I guess just pointing out that if using your hands to craft an artisan table that you sell for £1000 to fancy people in Chelsea is fine, and if giving a fancy massage to a fancy person in a fancy spa is fine, and if literally kneeling down to scrub feet and give a hundred discount pedicures a day is fine, and if scrubbing toilets for people who don’t even look at you when they come into the office building is fine… well! Why is something that’s actually better than certain jobs and no different from certain other jobs suddenly degrading? I think it’s a fair point. :)

And I’ve always privately wondered why being wildly underpaid to scrub *public toilets* (the most terrifyingly gross things in existence!) is something that’s completely ignored by all the people who shriek about sex work being degrading. I mean, sure, being underpaid and unappreciated or even mistreated in your job is degrading. Of course. That applies to some sex workers, yes. But it probably applies to ALL cleaning staff! So, really, there should be global outrage and campaigns to make the min-wage for loo-cleaning £100 per hour. :D

If you were ever up in the Manchester area, it would be good.